Don’t Touch (yourself)

Body language is a strange thing. Some authors I have read claim that more than 60-80% of your face to face communication is mediated through the way you use your body and voice. Considering how much time some of us spend on trying to say something intelligent in a conversation – that is certainly stuff for thought. I have personally had to adjust my body language at lot – and the effects are quite stunning. People are visibly more comfortable around you.

Things bring us to the interesting subject of “bad body habits”. You should build a habit to touch other people more, non-sexually in most cases, while you talk to them. Seduction specialists call this touching of ohers: “Kino”. But ironically, you should not touch your own body while you communicate. Touching your own body can signal many things, but all of them are negative. Furthermore, there are other disadvantages of letting your hands wander on yourself.

There are some pretty obvious habits you want to get rid of – and some not so easy to spot. Here is my short list:

Touch Location	The Problem	The Solution
Eyes	Allergies cause you to scratch you eyes. It helps, for about 10 seconds and then you get an eye infection	Use anti histamine eye drops. These act only locally and you avoid the usual problems with anti-histamine making you tired
Nose	Touching your nose is often interpreted as lack of comfort. To some people and cultures it even signals that you are lying. Don’t even get me started about picking your nose.	If you suffer from allergies, you are out of luck. Keep a napkin handy is my best advise. A stuffed nose can be fixed with a nose spray such as Otrivin and kleenex.
Pockets	Having your hands in your pockets signals either lack of interest or laziness	Practice keeping your body language open. You will find it very hard in the start as you continually curse yourself for not doing it. Keep your wrists visible or your hands along your sides… This will probably feel uncomfortable until you learn it
Chin	Unless you want to sit at a stone and pose as a deep thinker for statues, you are better off letting your head hold itself up	As you practice having you hands at your side or on the table in front you you – this habit will go away. If you frequently find yourself leaning you head on your hands – try leaning back and putting your fingertips together instead – this signals confidence in a conversation.
Groin	Do I need to tell you? Michael Jackson is dead, don’t imitate	Just don’t!
Front of chest	Folding your hands in front of your chest signals defiance and rejection. It is the most closed body language position you can adopt	Hold you hands out wide and show your wrists instead. Like this, you will become much more approachable
Ears	Yuck!	Use a cotton stick in the morning to clear out ear wax if that is your concern.
Scratching in general	I suffer from allergy a lot, scratching is annoying both to me and to people looking at it. It makes your body language very nervous	Carry a small tube of Hydrocortison   cream with you and apply it to allergic spots. Don’t overuse it though – it can damage your skin.